Thursday, August 1, 2013

What's wrong with you, FOX?

I'm old enough that I remember when FOX first started airing prime time animation shows (read: The Simpsons).  It was crazy enough that nobody really knew what to make of it, whether it was okay for children to see because it was "a cartoon" or if it was completely obscene.  Parents hated it, children loved it, and phrases like "Don't have a cow, man" and "Eat my shorts" became common phrases tossed around school yards.

The thing was, The Simpsons was also really funny.  It had a brilliant cast, well developed characters, and plots that at first seemed to simply be purely done for humor but would make you stop and think afterwards as you realized what it had in common with other things happening in the world.  To be fair, there was almost no ongoing character development unless something huge happened, such as a character's death or a wedding or a child being born.

But that was part of the charm.  Whenever we heard Mr. Burns say, "Simpson, eh?" or had Homer learn something important just to forget it the next episode, it managed to have a charm unique to it.  It was a world like something from the Twilight Zone, stuck forever in the same year, everybody forever remaining the same age, and living the same life forever.

And then things got weird.


Later on FOX tried to make lightning strike twice with The Critic, a show that was both a bit too high culture for its target audience while also relying on some pretty low brow humor.  It didn't have writing as clean as The Simpsons, the animation felt a little less "animated," and while I thought it was quite clever, it didn't really work out and left the air after two years.

Then came Family Guy, which I, personally, can't stand.  I liked it at the beginning, but the more I saw the less I enjoyed.  I love a good non-sequitor as the next person, possibly even more, but the best ones still manage to have some kind of context to back it up.  When Homer references something, it's usually connected with something he likes, such as beer, football, or food.  Lisa references classic literature, movies, and art.  Marge references things from retail markets, products for children, and programs that might get some flak from conservative groups.  When Family Guy does it, you don't really know where it comes from.  When Peter references Murphy Brown, is it because he watched the show?  Did he work in a news room?

Plus, and this is something that drives me insane, it drags out the jokes way too long.  It takes what could be great humor and turns it into empty filler, such as the fights with the chicken, or the oft-played scene where Peter hurts his leg and sits hissing and breathing for what feels like ten minutes.  Having Stewie ask if people get the jokes he made does better, since anyone who heard a small child tell a joke knows that they love to make sure you understand why it's funny instead of just letting the joke be, but there were so many times watching it that I just wanted to say "I'd rather watch one more commercial than see this drag out" that I eventually gave up.

Plus, it always bothered me that while Homer could come across as cruel or harsh or just an overall terrible parent, he genuinely wanted to be better.  He wanted to connect with Lisa, he wanted to have a good relationship with Bart, but he would often get in his own way multiple times before proving that nothing was going to stop him from being good to his family.  I never got that feeling with Peter.  Peter Griffin, in fact, I think is one of the worst characters on television.  He outright abuses his family for his own entertainment and never shows any remorse for it.

It's the same feeling I got watching Neon Genesis Evangeleon, if every character but the pet and one of the humans were dying, I'd root for death.

But I'm not here to talk about that program.  I'm here to talk about what I just watched, which is a clip from their upcoming series High School USA which appears to have characters even worse than Family Guy.  As near as I can tell, it's attempting to be a parody of Archie with a group of high school students, but every time I saw a joke (or something that I assumed was supposed to be a joke) I realized it had been done better somewhere else, or it was just terrible.

Usually I can understand a character's motivations, and when you look back at The Simpsons and saw that a character was motivated to perform some dramatic action, you would understand why or get a sense of there being some deeper reason behind it.  But when one high school girl starts sharing private pictures a boy sent another girl, you aren't sure if it's because she wants to be popular, if she's just a terrible person, or if she's just psycho.

Of course, she is in high school, and a lot of the girls I knew in high school did things for reasons I never understood, so maybe it's me.

I get trying to be "oooh, edgy" or tackle an important issue (which sexting or bullying in high schools is, of course), but when you leave me thinking "man, South Park would have been so much more subtle than this" or "if they had done this on Family Guy we'd at least be given something deeper than "hay guiz luk at this haw" as a motivation" it makes it feel like all you're really going for is shock value, which I guess I shouldn't really be surprised about when it comes from the channel that gave us Celebrity Boxing and enough When Animals Attack specials that I can't remember how many there were.

And if I never have to see another animated high school student squatting down on a toilet again it would not be too soon.

Come on, FOX, it's not too late, you could be that channel that was edgier than the other basic cable channels without go so far afield that you're trying to make more jokes about a high school boy's manhood than The Daily Show while covering Anthony Weiner's scandals.

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