What I did have was what might be the second golden age of cartoons after the days when Disney and Looney Tunes first erupted onto the scene, with such greats as Animaniacs, Duck Tales, Gargoyles, Freakazoid, and any number of other great programs who knew that in order to survive on television you had to be great because there wasn't a minor cable channel you could hide on to maintain a cult following.
One show that I think gets swept under the rug and forgotten about way too much is Mighty Max, which is why I'm doing an ongoing project of reviewing the series and seeing how it holds up. I'm leery about this one, because cartoon episodes featuring mixing humans and animals almost never turns out well.
You think I'm kidding about that, right? Go back and watch the episode "Tyger Tyger" of Batman: The Animated Series. It's the program that gave us this:
And for that, I'll never forgive it.
Anyway, at least in this episode it isn't strange fetishistic human/animal hybrids, it's werewolves!
The episode opens at
And yet, nothing really happens. Instead, the action cuts to a nearby church where an old man is searching for his "puss-puss." Apparently the man is daft enough that he isn't able to figure out that "howling" isn't something that cats do, and when he looks up into a tree to see if his cat is there, he can't figure out that one "puss-puss" shouldn't have six glowing eyes before a dark shape (whose shadow has three heads) leaps down upon him.
In other words, I figure the guy gets killed, but I don't feel that bad about it.
Current Casualties: 33
We cut back to Max's house, where it seems Virgil got tired of hiring skywriters and messengers and just straight-up shipped a VHS tape of himself telling Max where to go. I think Virgil's either running low on funds or he's just getting lazy.
Max arrives in Scotland just in time to come upon a crime scene and overhear a cop (wearing a kilt, I might add) who feels free to talk around people about how many "gruesome murders" there are happening in the area. Oh, and he also feels free to point accusingly at Max, a kid, as if to indicate that maybe he had something to do with it. However, before he can throw Max in prison as a suspect, a female scientist shows up with a tooth mold she made of the bites on the victim, and they're a bit more than regular human chompers.
But I want to point out, the female scientist says "they're just like the ones on all the others." You'd think the cop would at least check to see whether Max's mouth was about the size of the rest of his head before accusing him of anything.
Oh, but he does already have Virgil and Norman locked in jail. As suspects. Of mauling people with giant teeth. Again, this is a guy who carries around a giant sword and a talking chicken. Accused of murder. With giant teeth as the weapon.
Makes sense to me.
Oh, and he has another prisoner in a cell named "Cameron" who actually recognizes Max as "the cap bearer" and begs him for help, but the cop drags Max off and apparently decides the best thing to do is "give th' boy lodgin'" at his own home. His wife regales Max with stories about werewolves that apparently have always been around the area, but the cop dismisses the whole thing with "here now, shame on ya, old wife."
What I'm trying to say is this guy is awful.
Night falls, and Max is awakened by what appears to be a giant wolf creature pushing his window in. He runs out of the room just in time to bump into the- I'm not sure if he's a sheriff, a constable, or what, but he's off to the prison because something's up there. Max tags along, just to find that apparently Cameron (or someone helping him) was able to rip apart the bars in his window and run off leaving paw prints behind.
So, we have brutal murders happening, a suspect gone (with blood left behind), and something that can rend bars and leave wolf footprints. Obviously, the best thing the cop can do is tell Max to "go along home."
And the best thing Max can do is ignore him and wander off into the foggy woods towards the giant spooky castle.
Upon arrival, Max gets there just in time to see a werewolf standing on top of a castle tower howling at the full moon before changing back into Cameron...because, um, I guess they change back in direct light from the full moon now? Max freaks, figuring that Cameron is the killer, and runs off into the fog, getting horribly lost, until he stumbles upon another building with lights on.
This winds up being Professor MacDougle (McDouggle? McDoogle?) the scientist's place who created the tooth mold, and upon learning that Cameron is a werewolf, has probably the most interesting reaction I've ever heard:
"At last!"
She runs off leaving Max to try to find a phone to contact the police with, and he wanders into a lab where several figures (with strangely canine-shaped heads) are strapped to tables. The Professor pulls him back out and explains she's running a few experiments with a new rabies vaccine, she also completely 180s on her previous statement of believing everything Max said and getting excited to dismissing it as "there's no such thing as werewolves."
The Professor asks Max to lead her to the castle, but about four steps away from the building she vanishes and some slathering, howling terror erupts out of the fog and starts chasing Max. I'm sure the timing is completely coincidental.
Max manages to avoid it long enough to wind up either back at the castle or some other keep (Scotland is littered with the things, you know. You can't throw a rock without hitting an ancient stone structure) where he's saved from falling off of a tower by Cameron.
Cameron explains he's an immortal werewolf, alive for centuries (but not a killer). He's also a) aware of the legend of the cap bearer, and b) being hunted by some horrible terror that he needs a small boy to save him from.
Just then, the terror shows up, and it's a three headed werewolf with four arms.
Cartoons from the 90s were awesome.
Max has the brilliant plan of having himself and Cameron climb up some nearby scaffolding, and when the wolf creature tries to follow, it brings an entire wall down onto itself. They both figure the monster is dead (um, there's still about a third of the show left), and Cameron wishes that his pack was there to see the monster destroyed.
At this point, Max remembers the vaguely-dog-headed things (though, honestly, I think they looked more like they had beaks) in the professor's lab, and takes Cameron there to see if it's his missing pack.
Sure enough, it is, and Cameron and Max seem utterly perplexed a) where a giant monster came from, b) why the professor's not home, and c) why the werewolves are strapped to tables. It's not really a Batman-level mystery here, guys.
Meanwhile, at the castle, the chief constable (oh, that's his rank, okay) shows up after receiving a phone call that "his killer is there" and wanders around aimlessly before being conked on the back of the head with a brick by a naked Professor MacDougle (MacDoogel?).
Max and Cameron untie the other werewolves just in time for the Professor to show up wearing the chief constable's clothes (despite very different body shapes), and she explains she's been "milking the werewolves of their essence."
There's some other dastardly plot exposition about "power over life" but considering every other word is really thick with bad Scottish "r"s, I can't really make out any of it. Anyway, the Professor drinks the serum and turns into a three-headed werewolf again right in front of Cameron and Max.
Cameron and his pack attack the Prof-wolf, leaving Max to figure out a way to handle the matter once and for all, and in true heroic fashion he figures the best way to do it is to utilize about a dozen tanks of hydrogen and a Jacob's ladder (the electrical thing, not the superb horror movie of the same name) to blow up the entire lab. But how do you keep a giant monster in place while letting everyone else get free of the blast zone?
Of course. How silly of me.
Max and the werewolves escape, the entire lab blows up, and the chief constable is willing to accept the whole thing without batting an eye when Cameron and Max explain it to him. Oh, and he also lets Norman and Virgil go.
Post-cartoon, we get Max talking about the history of Scottish castles.
The Good:
I've said it before, it's great to get impressions of just how huge and expansive the world of Mighty Max is. I don't think the werewolves ever show up again, but if they did that'd be great to have a build-up to a huge fight where Max is able to bring back all the creatures he helped, whether they're squid people from under the ocean to werewolves.
It's also nice to see Max have to handle a few more things on his own, without Virgil standing around simply saying "go ahead and do it now, Mighty One" or Norman simply stepping up and beating the tar out of the threat.
The Bad:
There's actually quite a lot not to like about this episode. The "mystery" is paper-thin, since they only introduce four characters and they pretty much have only one person acting suspicious and completely changing their attitude ten seconds after you last see them. Plus, the fact that they give us the classic "whoops, monster's dead" moment only two thirds into the episode is pretty obvious.
Also, the accents are overpowering. I get it's a kid's cartoon, but I've had a lot more experience with Scottish accents now than I did when I was younger, so I'd be amazed if I understood anything said in this episode back then or if I just thought everybody was talking like a Wookie.
Overall:
While probably the weakest episode I've seen so far, there were still things to enjoy. I have to admit, that monster design is pretty spectacular since the creators didn't want to just be lazy and only give a four-armed werewolf just two heads. THAT would look ridiculous and would need some kind of explanation.
Also, I find it hilarious that in how paranoid censorship boards at the time behaved, they could have an obviously naked woman club a cop with a brick, but when Cameron is talking about what he'd like to do to the Professor in regards to kidnapping his "clan" and doing experiments on them, he can only say "say things to her in an ungentlemanly way."
So, in another week we'll finally be at the episode that mimics The Thing, and I can already tell you now I expect it to be at least an equal to the more recent film under the same name.
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