To every high there is a low. To every crowning achievement of someone's life, there's the moments where they feel like they've hit bottom. For every delicious ice cream flavor life provides, it has several cases of bubble-gum ice cream sitting somewhere in the back, just waiting.
I mean, seriously, why would you put gum, something not traditionally swallowed, into something that has a time limit before it melts and loses half of its appeal? Do you chew while licking? Do you gather the gum separately and store it while you finish the ice cream, then chew it? Who approved this abomination of taste?
But I'm getting off track. This past year I've had some things I discussed that I look back fondly on (see: yesterday's post), but there are also things I shudder and wonder "was I mean enough to that? Did I properly display the vitriol I felt towards that thing's very existence in order to convince people to not try to experience it themselves?"
Because if not, here's eleven more shots at those things to remind you that they exist and that they're terrible.
These are like finding a dead roach in your bubble-gum ice cream.
Showing posts with label Mr. Nanny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mr. Nanny. Show all posts
Wednesday, January 6, 2016
Friday, May 22, 2015
Mr. Nanny
Mr. Nanny is one hour and twenty-four minutes long.
That's the most important part of this review to keep in mind, because it took me four days to get through watching it. I'd watch some, boggle at how terrible it is, and then have to stop because my brain was trying to invent new layers of ADD so I'd look at something, anything else.
Originally I planned on doing a scene by scene breakdown of it, like I did movies like Dead or Alive, Barb Wire, or Bangkok Adrenaline, but... I can't. Those movies were at least ridiculous enough to be entertaining, while this one just feels like a group of "actors" got together and decided to do the minimal amount of work required to earn a paycheck.
When you manage to make a movie where I feel like even the cameras are bored, you know you've made a terrible movie.
That's the most important part of this review to keep in mind, because it took me four days to get through watching it. I'd watch some, boggle at how terrible it is, and then have to stop because my brain was trying to invent new layers of ADD so I'd look at something, anything else.
Originally I planned on doing a scene by scene breakdown of it, like I did movies like Dead or Alive, Barb Wire, or Bangkok Adrenaline, but... I can't. Those movies were at least ridiculous enough to be entertaining, while this one just feels like a group of "actors" got together and decided to do the minimal amount of work required to earn a paycheck.
When you manage to make a movie where I feel like even the cameras are bored, you know you've made a terrible movie.
 |
| Normally I'd just toss the DVD into my computer, rip some screenshots, and then post those, but I DON'T WANT IT PLAYING AGAIN. |
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)